Sunday, March 7, 2010

Where has the TIME gone??

First of all, I would like to thank everyone for their comments and prayers on my first three postings. Let me try to explain why I went MIA. Ellen got home, as I said, and she was like death warmed over. Much worse than I thought. That first week, I just didn't know if she was going to have to be admitted to a Hospital or not. Karen, her personal advocate and best friend stayed for a couple of days, but had to return home.
     Well, I dove right in to getting Ellen back on track. It has taken this long--since my last posting to say that we are just now starting to LIVE peacefully one day at a time AGAIN. I have had my left eye operated on. I have lost over 70 lbs since my weight loss surgery on October 15!!! I am having my right eye done on this Monday and I will be so glad when this is all over and I can see correctly. I will have to wear reading glasses...but no more glasses!! WOW. One day after surgery on my Left Eye...I could read 20/30 vision from it. That just totally amazes me.
     When Ellen got home and was too sick to walk her 12 year old lab/chow mix service dog, Mandy--I jumped right in! I needed the excercise anyways! And I love Mandy...she has grown on me since I first met Ellen. Well, I have taken over the care for Mandy and it has been decided that I will officially be co-owner of Mandy by december when she actually retires as a service dog. I am so thrilled!! I brush and groom Mandy--clip her nails--which ellen can't believe she lets me do them--I walk Mandy a lot more than she was getting walked with Ellen. This is so good for the both of us.
     Mandy has started spending the night with me. Some nights, like tonight, Ellen called for Mandy to come and Mandy wouldn't budge. We were both headed out the door--Ellen to go home and I to do laundry. Ellen said, 'call Mandy.' And I said, 'Mandy come!' and she leaped up and came right to me. Ellen said, 'what a piece of work!' LOL I told Ellen it melts my heart, but it makes me love Ellen even more!
     I do the cooking and cleaning up for dinner and sometimes for lunch. I usually cook enough food to have leftovers for lunch then something fresh for dinner the next night. And Ellen appreciates this very much. She does things for me. Like when all this came up about my eye surgery for cataracts...medicaid wouldn't pay for the astigmatism part....which is really stupid. Medicaid would fix the cataracts but then I would still be wearing very thick lenses to see. So, when Ellen heard this, she asked 'well, how much is the doctor going to charge you for the correction of the astigmatism with the new lenses in your eyes?' I droaned to tell her....$800 dollars The next thing I know we are in her car headed to the eye doctor; and Ellen writes a check for $800 dollars. She said, "that is really stupid to go through all of this and not have the astigmatism fixed."
     Words just can't express what her friendship means to me. We have both been burned so many times before in friendships. It is nice to know we can depend on each other to help out in what ever ways possible that we can AND be appreciated.
     So, I have done very little stitching because of my eyes...had to wait 2 weeks between the left and the right eye...and before i had the left eye done there was a week and a half wait. And prior to me finally going to the eye doctor I was having migrane headaches. so, this has been a LONG ordeal for me.
     I am still in one on one  counseling with Jo Miller. She is so great. The past three sessions we have had were all paperwork for the new year. We did get to touch base on the fact that my mind has not caught up with the fact of how much weight i have lost. I mean --come on --70 lbs!! that is a small child!! that is what my best friend Valerie said when she came down from bamberg. I enjoyed visiting with her for the day. And we went thrift store shopping and out to eat at a mexican restuarant. Back to the counseling...I have very low self esteem...and depression. I am also not sleeping well. My son is a marine and he was deployed to afghanistan. I am not happy about that at all.
     the doctor put me on two Klonopin per day instead of just one. It does help. The pain in my knees is some better. I got cortisone shots in both of them and I go back to the specialist in a month. He said my problem is arthritis and fibromyalgia. But I am out there walking every day! The pain in my neck and my back have still not been authorized by medicaid. They told the doctor that i had severe chronic pain....and so they turned me down for physical therapy because they said...her pain will never go away....HOW STUPID...It could HELP IT though!! GESHE jimney christmas.
      All my animals are doing good. Fantail has a clean tank right now, Heidi has been chirping away....Church, goofy cat, he is right behind me now meowing for attention LOL. Mandy is gaurding the front door. And I am so tired right now ...I think I could fall asleep!!
    So I am logging off, wishing everyone happiness and peace! your friend, pamela